the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
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