Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Randomize