For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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