how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
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