they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize