I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
