There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Randomize
