They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I was not drunk enough for that final.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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