I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Just cropdusted the office
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Randomize