did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
