so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
I know her cup size but not her name....
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
