wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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