if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
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I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
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I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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