he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
Randomize