so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
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its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
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I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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