After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
