She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Randomize
