Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
