Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
