Well apparently he's into motor boating.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Randomize
