You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize