Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Someone signed my nipple.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
