none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
