the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
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