I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
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