your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Randomize
