the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
