One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
this just has baby written all over it
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize
