"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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