Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
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if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
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This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?