They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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