Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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