She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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