Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
