I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
it's like iHOP with fire
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
