but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Randomize
