i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
