She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
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