i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Randomize
