Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Randomize
