i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Randomize
