Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
