You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
