Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
