I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
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