I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Why did my mother make you get naked?
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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