Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
