Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
