we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
