Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Randomize
